I would like to start by saying that making the decision to homeschool your child never comes lightly. It's quite daunting, to be honest. I'm pretty sure no one (or almost no one) wakes up one day and says "I think I'm going to uproot everything; change my routine and lower or possibly cut out one income completely," all to take on a new challenge that is quite frankly not for the faint of heart.
I would like to further say that having taken on the role as the teacher assistant (those that are physically with the children, helping out are called learning coaches), I have a newfound - profound respect for those individuals that day by day educate children in a brick and mortar school. Some may not be able to fill those shoes, but they are the exception, NOT the rule. I may have the brick and mortar school system experience with a bitter taste in my mouth, but I have also forged lasting friendships with some teachers and staff that I greatly admire and keep in touch with to this day. With that being said, I will start from the begining.
I have bounced around a couple of elementary schools with my first two kids. Mainly, it was due to the fact that my oldest son - the sweetest boy you could ever meet (not just sayin it cz I'm his momma lol), was repeatedly getting bullied. At one point, one of his aggressors was his very own teacher. He was - as that teacher called him - odd, and marched to the beat of his own drum. I, in my distress - just figured that it was a New York thing (we're originally from New York). I blamed living in the city for all my sweet little boy was going through. I chalked it up to how tough and rude all New Yorkers were (most of them are not lol). So we packed our bags and moved to North Carolina, the "Green State".
We fell in love with North Carolina immediately upon moving here. My boy was less stressed and less anxious. So was my girl. Things were good at first - all the teachers were so sweet and he became so attached to them. However, he still couldn't quite make friends. He was later diagnosed with a developmental disorder called Aspergers. He was also diagnosed with ADD/ADHD.
By the time my two older kids were in fourth grade, I had my youngest two in school as well. As my first born got older, the bullying unfortunately did not let up. He was far too often alone at lunch and ridiculed by his classmates because he had a terrible studder; he could never get jokes. He was just too literal and that offended and annoyed his peers. To make things worse, he had a real weak immune system and was really asthmatic. He could never just have a cold - it went from a sniffle to full blown pneumonia within a day. Helicopter mom that I was (I was literally called that by a school staff member, and not in an endearing way), I kept him home as much time was necessary for him to fully heal. Otherwise, he would go to school two days and come back extremely ill and have to miss two more days. Needless to say, I ended up in a court battle over custody of the very boy that I had become such an advocate for. I had all the medical paperwork to justify absolutely all of his absences, yet I still ended up having to plead guilty. Those were really really dark days.......
The Turning Point:
While I was embroiled in the child neglect allegations due to my son's absenses, I went one day to pick up my younger two who were in elementary school (my oldest two were in intermediate school at that point). For no particular reason, on that day, I decided I would go a whole hour early to the elementary school to pick up my two mini's. I reasoned I could be the first car at the pick up line and be on my way a lot faster. As I am looking out the car window, I see this poor boy that looked red as a tomato - sweaty, crying, pounding on windows begging to be let into the building. IT WAS MY BOY!!! My 8 year old boy, was left behind during recess, and the teacher never noticed he was gone. He was alone for two and a half hours outside of the building, in the blazing sun. And his teacher never noticed his absence.
I still shudder at the what if's of that day. What if i hadn't decided to go to school a whole hour earlier? What if he had left the school grounds, because he could not find an open door? What if he was kidnapped (God forbid)? What if......
That experienced, paired with the hell and embarrassment I was caused going through the court system - was my WHY for making the change.
That my friends was the last year my kids attended a brick and mortar school.
If you in any way are going through challenges that make you question if your child is in the right environment - trust your gut. Homeshcooling is not for everyone, but neither is the traditional brick and mortar environment. My hope is that my story can help you if you are undecided. If you are a parent going through a situation with your child, please know that you are not alone.
My goal is to build, bit by bit a community of support, of positivity and of love. I would love to hear from you! You can suscribe to my blog and follow me on my social media networks (links above). Lets stay in touch!
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